On a recent Sunday night, we gathered around the long wooden table at Ryan and Amy’s, the kids squirming, everyone holding hands for a brief pause in the chaos of our evening together. It was Amy’s turn to pray, and she began as she always does: “Almighty God, we are so grateful for all that we have been given.”
I’m fascinated by the different ways people address God, especially since most people tend (consciously or not) to pick one and stick with it. I wonder if a person’s name for God, the way they address him (or her), reveals how they see God, the kind of deity they picture when they pray.
Amy’s prayers always begin at that place of reverence and gratitude, the place of acknowledging our blessings. She is one of the most honest and realistic people I know, but she is also good at being amazed, and good at being thankful.
Ryan, Amy’s husband and a chemistry professor, always begins with “Our Creator God.” Ryan spends his days teaching undergraduates about the tiny building blocks of our universe, and has spent a fair amount of time over the years thinking about science and faith. He deals with creation all day, every day, but what I love about his form of address is the “our”: for Ryan, the “our” is inextricably linked to the “Creator.”
My friend Julie, a warm and lovely soul who grew up with a cold and abusive father, addresses God as “Holy Father.” Her phrase reveals the twin aspects of God’s character that she holds most dear: his vast, mysterious holiness, and his closeness as the kind of father she desperately needed. My own dad also addresses God as “Father.” He learned early on, as I did, what it meant to have a loving human father, and he believes simply and completely in God as that same kind of Father.
My dad’s parents prayed the same table prayer for many years, the one that began, “Come, Lord Jesus, be our guest.” They were humble people, who worked hard and lived simply and raised their three boys to love God and love others, and they acknowledged Jesus both as Lord and guest.
My other grandpa, my mother’s dad, prays his own table prayer before every meal, usually with the same words and always with the same inflections. I can chart the words by the rise and fall of his deep voice, and he, too, begins from a place of gratitude: “Heavenly Father, we thank you for this day.”
I learned the Lord’s Prayer as a little girl, but rarely prayed it (either alone or with others) until I found my way to Highland as a college student. At that church (in West Texas), at the big Anglican church I attended in Oxford, and at our tiny church here in Boston, the congregations recite the Lord’s Prayer together every week. We pray the ancient, resonant phrases of gratitude and praise and supplication, and we always start the same way: “Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name.”
When I pray alone, sometimes I call him Father. Sometimes I repeat the “Come, Lord Jesus” prayer; sometimes I borrow a line from Shane & Shane and pray, “Be near, O God.” Sometimes I begin a prayer from the Compline service: “Keep watch, dear Lord, with those who work or watch or weep this night.”
Most often, it’s simply “Dear God,” the way I learned to address God as a child. He is holy, mysterious and infinite, a big God whom I can’t define or explain. But he is also dear, an entity I have known all my life.
These days, I usually begin there, and then I often borrow Amy’s phrase: I am so grateful for all that I have been given.
If you are a person who talks to God, what names do you use?
I’ve never thought about this before – how we address God can reveal something of ourselves and our relationship to him. As I read about your family, I remembered so many in mine (many who have passed away) and how they prayed. I am in awe right now and a little teary-eyed thinking of them. I usually start my prayers with “Gracious God.” Being a Lutheran, this does not really surprise me, as grace is at the center of our relationship to Him. Thank you for this thoughtful piece…
I read your post several times this morning, reading it silently, then aloud, Your words here and your thoughts are a blessing for which I thank you, Katie. That everyone addresses God in their own way is such an awesome testament to God’s relationship with us all.
Dear Lord or Dear God is most often my beginning. Growing up in the Greek (Eastern) Orthodox tradition, doing the sign of the cross was most often what I did before a meal. Although my faith journey has taken me to another church, I still find myself instinctively making the cross when I am troubled, in the name of the Father. I actually learned the Lord’s Prayer first in Greek, which still comes to me at times as I am reciting the Lord’s Prayer.
Beautiful message and post.
I do the same as you! When I pray in my head I usually say “dear Lord” as my parents taught me when I was a child. When I’m talking about Him in conversation I usually say God or Christ. When addressing Him in public(ish)–which isn’t my most comfortable–I usually will say “Father”. I think this is such an interesting way to look at a relationship. I most like to think of Him as the loving father.
What a fascinating post! My dad’s prayer always begins “Our most gracious Heavenly Father.” I think my “Dear God” lacks some of that majesty and identity. I’m going to reread this in a quiet place (rather than a cancer ward) and possibly change some habits!
That’s fascinating. I’ve never thought about it this way before.
I rarely address God by name when I pray (though when I do, it’s “Jesus”), because he knows who he is and that he’s meant. What does that reveal about me?
I usually say Father God in small groups, and Almighty God in big groups. I don’t know why the distinction, but now maybe I’ll pay a little more attention. Thanks for the observations, Katie!
Often it’s JESUS. Sometimes it’s Abba. Occasionally it’s Yo God. Always it’s conversational and relational, because while He’s my King, Lord, Saviour, Master, etc. He’s also my Friend! 🙂
Very well put, Steph!
A favorite prayer of mine in the Eastern Orthodox Christian Church is
O Heavenly King, the Comforter, the Spirit of Truth
Who art everywhere present and filling all things
the Treasury of good things and Giver of Life
Come and abide in us and cleanse us from every stain
and save our souls, O Good One.
I often just say, O God or Lord or Merciful Father. Lord have mercy is often on my lips.
Days when I come to Him in pain, confusion, or sorrow, He is “Father in Heaven” as I want to crawl into a strong lap, lay my head on His chest, and shed some tears. When I have done wrong and need some confession time, He is “Great God” as I sit in humility.