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My family has a deep love for 1990s romantic comedies – from While You Were Sleeping to French Kiss to the Nora Ephron classics. When my sister was unpacking my DVDs recently, she exclaimed, “You have all the good ones!”
One of my faves in this category is Runaway Bride, which I love for its brilliant supporting cast (including Rita Wilson and Hector Elizondo); its quirky small-town details (a hair salon called Curl Up & Dye!), and its best friend, the salon owner, played by Joan Cusack. (“Peggy Flemming–not the ice skater.”)
At one point in the film, Peggy and Maggie (Cusack and Roberts) are at the town softball game when Maggie spots Ike (Gere’s journalist character) approaching. “I will handle this,” Peggy says, in true best-friend fashion. Maggie snaps: “Don’t move your lips!” (They’ve already figured Ike can probably read lips.)
“I will handle this!” Peggy exclaims, through clenched teeth. “I won’t say anything.”
Lately, this is how I often feel. Whether it’s setting up utilities or hanging pictures, writing book reviews or sorting out divorce paperwork, I find myself thinking, “I will handle this!” while worrying I’m not handling it at all.
To be clear, I’ve had lots of help: my mom, my sister, several stalwart friends. But a lot of these responsibilities fall solely to me, and that can be exhausting. And the never-ending list(s) of tasks can make me feel like I’m failing at all of it.
And yet: my little apartment, full of light and books and my favorite things, is coming together. The book reviews are (mostly) getting turned in (relatively) on time. I have gas and electricity and enough food to eat. And not every decision has to be made today.
“There is nothing you’re not handling,” my therapist said the other day, her gentle eyes full of kindness, as they always are. In the midst of such massive transition, it’s worth cultivating a little self-compassion – or, sometimes, channeling my inner Peggy Flemming. (Not the ice skater.)
cakes, tea and dreams 
Blessings to you.
I heartily approve this movie line. They can be so helpful. 😉
They can! I know you get it.
From what I’ve seen here, you’re so open to life, love, and others, you will handle it all. <39
Thank you. ❤
Oops, ❤
I so relate to this: “But a lot of these responsibilities fall solely to me, and that can be exhausting. And the never-ending list(s) of tasks can make me feel like I’m failing at all of it.” As someone who has had all the responsibility since college, I can’t say it gets easier but that exhaustion and feeling of failure seems to be part of the cycle. When it happens, I acknowledge those feelings, try to do something kind for myself, and then I keep pressing on. You’ve got this, Katie.
Thanks, friend. I know you get this part of the story. xo
you’ve got this! warrior on!
Thank you!
Your writing here is beautiful, even about such terribly hard things. I’m so sorry you are in pain – thank you for writing in the middle of it. I love the way you closed with gentleness for yourself. My heart is with you. (Hoping a package arrived!)
Baby steps! Sounds like you’re doing great.
You will handle it. You are remarkable and capable women.
That’s one of my favorite movies (you’ve inspired me to dig out the DVD and watch it sometime this week!) and Peggy is awesome. I may need to start using that line myself as I try to handle all the things starting up with the coming of fall (and all that entails).
Oh, it’s so good! And yes, you will handle all the things too. xo
Love this perspective! Way to handle it.
P.S. My hair salon here in East Texas? It’s called “Curl Up & Dye.” 😉
I. Love. It. There was one in my old neighborhood too!
You *are* handling it. Be kind to yourself. X