It used to be a kind of game: I’d sit in meetings, especially ones marked “strategy” or “content,” and mentally (or sometimes physically) take note of every empty word or phrase my colleagues, or especially outside consultants, used to talk about our work. Words like stakeholders, platforms, multi-channel, workflow and especially content. The words ask and creative used as nouns; the word language used as a verb; acronyms like KPIs and ROI and SEO. I’ve even heard a few like operationalize (what?).
All of it makes me itch – it seems like a false, too-easy way to get away from talking about what we’re really doing (writing stories, interviewing people for podcasts, creating websites and brochures) and why we’re doing it (to get students to enroll, to advertise events or programs, to inform and entertain our alumni or other audiences). Jargon is also a way to exclude people: it’s so easy for students or new colleagues or even experienced folks not to know what you’re talking about. It’s gatekeeping language, often used to self-aggrandize or hide problems, and it is bland and impenetrable as tofu.
This is a problem as I continue the job hunt, because most of the job descriptions I’ve seen contain a fair amount of jargon. I can translate it, and I don’t fault them for it, necessarily, but the jobs I’m drawn to tend to be the ones whose posters write clearly and concisely about what the job actually entails. If a job description is stuffed full of hyphenated phrases with no real meaning, I’m wary of both the job and workplace it’s trying to describe.
While communications work in general is a bit more abstract than, say, serving coffee or teaching a yoga class, it does include measurable, concrete tasks along with the broader work of “strategy” and “ideation.” I don’t want to work at a place where people are so wrapped up in high-flown phrases that they’re unable to define what they actually do. We are all human beings who live in a tangible world, and I believe it’s important to talk about our work in human (vivid, interesting) terms. I also believe we should be able to laugh or roll our eyes at ourselves when we do get tangled up in jargon.
Have you run into long-winded, abstract job descriptions in your own searches? (Please tell me I’m not alone.) And other than a well-practiced eye roll, what is there to do about it?
cakes, tea and dreams 
This is something I forgot to “hear hear” in your other job hunting posts. This Drive Me Crazy. It’s actually something I felt especially itchy about in academia, but there’s nothing like a job hunt to show you it’s everywhere. I said many times to my husband, “People have no idea how to write job descriptions. I mean, WHAT IS THIS JOB?” Or, as you suggest, perhaps they’re written terribly because the employer is scared to tell us what a job actually entails?? Another possibility is that the job description writer doesn’t know what the job entails. Perhaps you and I should start a job board for people leaving jobs and people looking for jobs. People who are leaving a job will write the job description for it so it’s LEGIT.
I feel you’re exactly right – I resort to jargon in my current job when I’m not totally sure how transparent to be with the person on the other end. My superior is cc’d, so I use the jargon to make sure I’m not over-exposing us and thus what the external party gets is total fluff. I loathe it. As you know, I’m idealistic about a lot of things when it comes to job culture so it largely disappoints. You are definitely not alone in this one. Say what you mean. This should be the slogan for job boards.
As far as ideas go, having just been through the exact roller coaster you’re on, I know the feeling well when you begin to think the silence thus far is an indicator that that’s all you will ever get, but it’s not true. I became convinced I was un-stand-outable, and yet that’s exactly what the person who ended up hiring me kept saying – how much I stood out. I can’t promise anything except that the past really isn’t indicative of the future in this scenario. Anything can happen.
Also, use the interview to get to the bottom of things as much as possible. It’s hard to do, honestly, and I didn’t do it that well this time around. I wanted a new job so much that I kept convincing them I could handle the “demands” of the job and “project management is exactly what I’ve been doing” instead of saying, “What do you mean it’s demanding??” as I should have said. Don’t be like me. Don’t be afraid to ask, “What might my day look like?” Try to make them be as specific as possible. That jargon stuff has to GO.
A serious question – Have you ever considered starting your own business? There must be so many clients out there who are also tired of all the jargon. Good luck and keep trying!
Oh my goodness, yes! Also, have you checked public school districts for opportunities?
I can tell you that many (most?) job descriptions are written by people who don’t have direct experience with the job. In an ideal world, they coordinate with managers to make sure the job description reflects what the employee is actually going to do; in many cases, they’re just slightly tweaked (if tweaked at all) from the job description that was in use the last time there was a vacancy announcement.
In my line of work, job descriptions don’t contain much jargon (or maybe it’s ceased to become jargon and just become my language… must explore that) but they are heavy on acronyms. Just about every job description I read in my most recent job search included a variation on “Advise HR and train management on Title VII, ADEA, ADA, FMLA, FLSA, USERRA…” My generous read is that if an applicant doesn’t know the acronyms for the statutes they will be advising on, they’re better off not wasting their own time writing a cover letter. But I hear and validate you on the gatekeeping of jargon (and acronyms)!